Mavs to add men's Quidditch, not tennis, for MIAA move
April Fool's Issue
Issue date: 4/1/08 Section: Sports
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Editor-in-Chief
Because of Title IX concerns, UNO decided to drop the addition of men's tennis to its sports lineup as the university changes conferences to the Mid-American Intercollegiate Athletics Association.
However, to meet MIAA requirements, the addition of another sport is still necessary. To fill the missing hole, UNO decided to offer Quidditch - which is open to both male and female athletes.
Quidditch, a sport popularized in the "Harry Potter" series, is played on broomsticks with teams trying to shoot quaffles through three upright hoops. Points are also scored by capturing the golden snitch, a small golden ball that flies around the stadium.
Mike Kemp announced his intention to stop coaching Maverick hockey team, which has its second-worst loss in school history in its last road trip, to coach Quidditch instead.
Sophomore goaltender Jeremie Dupont also announced that he would be leaving the hockey team to play keeper for the Mavs.
"The way I figure it, Qudditch is essentially hockey on broom sticks," Kemp said. "I want to emphasis bludger control and planning for the future. We're looking ahead. The bumps in the head [not literally, we hope] now will pay off in the future."
According to the Omaha World-Herald, UNO is in talks with Pinar Saka to play seeker for the Quidditch squad.
Rumors on MavQuaffle.com claim that the university is also in talks with Brandon Scero and Bill Bagron to convince them to return to UNO from the East Central Hockey League.
Associate professor of communication Sherrie Wilson is expected to officiate home matches. UNO is also expected to hire several demeanors to help secure the field from the sinister She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named.
If the sport is successful, the university is also considering building a permanent Quidditch stadium on the Center Street campus, where the Maverick soccer team currently plays.
UNO will join several other universities across the country that offer Quidditch. Princeton University played Middlebury University in the Quidditch World Cup in fall 2005, which was overseen by Middlebury Quidditch Commissioner Alex Benepe.
"One day, we hope that there could be an international competition since we've heard that people are playing Quidditch overseas," Benepe told The Daily Princetonian in an interview.
The Mavs' first home game will take place on July 4 against the University of Michigan Weasels, who are coached by Percy Weasley. Members of the Bullpen are encouraged to signup for the game's Facebook.com event for a chance to win promotional broomsticks.
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